Here's a wonderful bicycle, let's take a few seconds to soak in all its magnificence...
Drop handlebars, down-tube gear lever, streamlined chromium detailing to the mudguard (below) and 'striking' colour scheme of metallic blue and gold. In every respect I'm sure you'll agree that she's a 'beaut'.
But who could own such a stylish velocipede and more importantly where was she made?
Well the answer to the first question is easy - the proud owner of this eye-catching machine is our very own Jade Wall (21) of Year 2 Illustration.
Where she was made is a little more surprising. The bike in question is a 'Whirlwind' model crafted in that sleepy, North Lincolnshire town of Barton-upon-Humber by the Elswick Bicycle Company.
It has to be admitted that Barton is hardly synonymous with the production of sturdy 'sports bicycles' but it is the birthplace of Chad Varah, founder of the Samaritans and manufacturer of the famous Chad Varah Teddy Bear.
Anyway we digress... The real point of this story concerns a spot of rear mudguard slippage that was threatening to turn Jade's 'metallic steed' into an accident waiting to happen.
From his office high above the studio floor our very own Jim Millington (33) sensed that something was wrong. On descending to the studio floor he was drawn to the bicycle in the corner and quickly ascertained the cause of his distress.
This dramatic display of paranormal power is easily explained, as Jim also hails from North Lincolnshire, and has the semi-mystical gift of 'Elswick empathy'.
It should be noted that all people from North Lincolnshire have the 'empathy' and feel duty bound to offer assistance if they encounter an Elswick in trouble.
After a quick 'fettle' with a pair of long nose pliers (NB. totally the wrong tool for the job) all was well and Jade was free to ride off into a golden sunset but sadly couldn't as it was raining.
The great man in action - Jade (21) looks on, understandably concerned.
"All done and no charge as it was my duty to help" - Jade breathes a huge sigh of relief...